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    April 13

    无名指端的荒凉

     好象血管破了, 无名指端在这个雨天凉凉的。左手的无名指那有一颗痣的手指。总有些什么在不远处
    发生——关系到这个小小的感觉。
    没有人能将自己所处的阴霾和混乱理清。星期三在哈根达斯的门店玻璃后面,她说:做个小的心理测试吧。她蜷
    着手掌的时候有什么东西早就扎根在血液里。心理学能解决什么?是他,她,还是她们本身?聊起过去早已唏嘘的
    年华。总在一个一个的替代之后找到最本真的感觉。可怜的人类。
       你喜欢病态的,神秘的,优雅的,自我的——他说。
       如果在古代我一定以为他就是最准的占心师。那么快那么准就从我的思想里捉出了端倪。这是我自己
    都不曾知道的。他没有很快否定我的感情。至少他说你是正常的。也许这是爱的极度缺乏症。一种伟大的东西。
    但是跨过去,去表达。
      去表达对我来说有多难?似乎宁愿承受心里的煎熬。时间就像水一样清澈的流淌了。
    而那些如兰草般的女子呢?学会了骑马,运动,烘焙,茶艺,女红,养花识草。单单没学会
    在人群里妥协。等王子即使是骑白马的唐僧。
    我问他这是不是命?他说是性格决定命运。
    早点问他多好呢,可能早就找到了问题的答案。
    可是答案有什么重要呢?换个人我也会告诉他们该怎么做吧。
    有很多事情在我们的意识里,感觉里。在出生之前就埋藏好了。ENJOY。即使是残忍的。
     

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